Log Entry 19: Taken from The Bureau's Laboratory on 08/19/2017 at 10:26:34

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Alastor Hacon: (In the distance, yelling) Ozzi!

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Ozzi Smithe: Oh God...

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Hacon: (In the room) Ozzi!

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Smithe: Hold on.

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(Silence. Only the sound of keyboard clicks can be heard.)

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Hacon: Oz–.

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Smithe: Wait.

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(Keyboard and mouse clicks can be heard.)

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Smithe: There. Alright, what's–! (Pauses, then sighs) (Muttering) I swear I'm going to get a sign that says "Clothes mandatory in Lab". (Regular speaking volume) Where is your shirt, Alastor?

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Hacon: I can't even put my shirt on! My arms don't work!

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Smithe: Well, this makes more sense than when Melonie did it...

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Hacon: Wait, what–?

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Smithe: (Cutting Alastor off) Have you taken any medication recently?

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Hacon: I had a helluva hangover, so I took some painkillers.

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Smithe: Ibuprofen or acetaminophen?

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Hacon: (Long pause) ...the one that is not ibuprofen.

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Smithe: Ah. The medication has shut down the connection between your nervous system and your implants. That's why you armor only gives you ibuprofen when you–

 

Hacon: Just tell me how to stop this! I'm freaking out!

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Smithe: Go drink a cup of coffee, you'll be fine.

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Hacon: Oh, thank God.

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Smithe: Oh, one more thing!

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(Silence)

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Smithe: Your face? Still haven't told me.

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Hacon: (Groans)