“I NEEDED YOU”

A BLUR HAVOK SHORT STORY

Valhalla State University: 2016

 

“Oh shit!” A small, fair-skinned woman fell down the stairs on a college campus. She tumbled on the stone ground onto her back. She giggled goofily to herself. Her round cheeks were rosy red. She sat up and looked at the blur of individuals standing at the top of the stairs. “I’m good!” she yelled sloppily. She flopped onto her back and listened to the voices of her fellow students.

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“Yo, she is wild.” someone said.

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“And that’s supposed to be the class president?” Another person said.

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“She’s an awesome one if you ask me.” a male laughed.

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“Ay yo ‘hoop girl’!” one called out.

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The woman on the ground moaned to herself. She fumbled around on the ground. “Hoop? Where’s my hoop?” She incoherently slurred.

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“It’s up here, bro!” a man called out. “Come get it!” he laughed.

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A woman groaned. “I’m calling campus police. She needs help.”

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“Nuh-uh!” the woman on the ground called out. “I’m perfet-ly fine!” 

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“Damn, she’s a cheap date.” a male said.

 

**********

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“Ma’am?” A voice said quietly.

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The woman groaned wearily. “Where am I?” she slowly and painfully opened her eyes. She was laying on a cot in a room.

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“Miss, uh…” the male voice paused as if reading something. “Ms. Melonie Sanders?”

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“That’s…” she moaned. “That’s me.” she rubbed her head. She finally looked at the man questioning her. It was a uniformed campus police officer. Oh, God. she thought.

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“Well, at least you remember your name.” the officer placed Melonie’s driver’s license back in her wallet and back on the table. “It’s safe to assume you’ve had one too many,” he said, stroking his ginger mustache. “How are you?”

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Melonie stared at the officer like he was an alien. “Am I in trouble?”

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The officer laughed softly through his nose. “No, ma’am. It’s just a public health concern call.” he leaned forward in his seat. “But I have to ask again; how are you?”

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“I’m— I’m fine.”

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The officer nodded. “We attempted to contact your relatives, but we had none on file and neither of your emergency contacts responded.”

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Melonie’s heart dropped. “Really? How many times did you try?”

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“Twice. Each, ma’am.”

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Melonie looked away from the officer, processing what he said. “You must have the wrong contacts or something,” she said in a soft whine.

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“We have ‘Alastor Hacon’ and ‘Ozzi Smithe’. That correct?” His caucasian face creased as he raised his eyebrow.

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“Yes,” she said with defeat. She looked down at the floor.

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The officer cleared his throat awkwardly. “In any case, I doubt you’d want to go outside looking… uh… indecent. We’ve left some clothes for you to your left.” he stood up and exited the room. “I’ll walk you out when you’re ready.”

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Melonie finally realized that she was in her underwear, bra, and was missing one flat. She gasped and covered herself reactively. She hid her face and sighed. 

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 **********

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Melonie walked out of campus police Headquarters. She waved goodbye to the officer that assisted her. Her ill-fitting grey sweatpants and white t-shirt hung off her like Christmas tree decorations. Melonie hurried to her dorms up the street, trying her best to hide her makeup-smeared face. It was early Friday morning; a day she had no classes. Students moved through the campus in a zombie-like trance. Melonie jogged to the dorm and slid inside the lobby as stealthily as she could, using her small body to her advantage.

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In the lobby, a group of students pretended to study together. They laughed and joked, but suddenly noticed Melonie. Their good-natured laughter turned into a choir of hissing gossip; their smiles transformed into ill-meaning grins. 

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Melonie’s stomach dropped. She quickly scurried through the lobby and covered her face. She could hear them saying something, but she couldn’t quite make it out. Her dignity was more important than her mild curiosity. She definitely heard the words “her breasts”.

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Melonie rushed up the stairs and to her dorm room. It was luckily only on the second floor. She unlocked the door with her key and swiftly shut it behind her. 

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Then it hit her.

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Her head pounded. It felt like her brain was in a vice. The pain was intense and overwhelming. All she could do was stumble to her bed and collapse into her pillows. She kicked off the cheap, black flats the Campus Police gave her and curled up into a ball on her pastel purple comforter. She mashed her face into a pillow and groaned. 

Oh my God, how much did I drink? She thought. 

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It was the last thing Melonie thought before drifting off into slumber.

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**********

 

Melonie woke up suddenly, realizing she had dozed off. She jerked alive and spun around. Amazingly, there was still daylight outside. Her quaintly decorated dorm room was quiet and still; students were still in class. She remembered that she left her phone in the room for the night. The only smart move I made last night, I’m sure. 

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When she activated the screen, her stomach dropped. There were hundreds of notifications on her screen. She unlocked the phone and opened a notification. Her jaw dropped. Dozens of videos of the previous night were on social media. Melonie watched in horror as her poor judgment was on full display. Tears welled in her eyes as a rock formed in her throat. 

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Then she opened the comments.

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“Fr tho she a slut.”

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“OMFG what even is this!”

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“This shit wild wtf”

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“Knew she was loose.”

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“Little ass cute af tho.”

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Melonie locked the phone and hugged her knees. She began crying intensely. She heaved and gasped for air. The shame that washed over her was overbearing. 

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She wiped her face and looked at her phone. She unlocked it and opened the phone app. She went to her “Favorite” contacts. Only three contacts sat there: Ozzi Smithe, Bria Midgette, and Alastor Hacon.

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She instantly dialed Alastor.

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The phone rang.

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…

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And rang…

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…

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And rang…

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…

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And rang…

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…

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Until…

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“Hello, no one is available to take your call. Please leave a message after the tone.”

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Melonie gasped. She hung up and dialed again. The same canned message played. Melonie stared at the screen. The picture of a smiling, mohawked Alastor benignly grinned at her. Her heart tore. It was then that she finally realized that she and Alastor hadn’t spoken in months. His warm, smiling face was so foreign to her. She felt ashamed. 

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She hung up the call and dropped the phone onto her feet. She laid her head in her knees and cried in her social damnation.

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**********

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Six months passed.

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The Valhalla Civil War started approximately five months ago.

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**********

 

Melonie stood in front of a large cathedral-like pair of doors. She waited patiently with a portfolio, hugging her chest. She wore a black blazer with a purple blouse underneath, black jeans, and black heeled booties. She had a small, cuddly smile on her face. One of the massive doors swung open. An albino face peeked out with a pair of green goggles over his eyes.

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“Melonie?” He said with an excited laugh. He lifted the goggles off his eyes and stepped out from behind the door. His lean, six-foot body towered over Melonie, his black lab coat covered his tall body. His green eyes welcomed Melonie like a father being visited by his adult daughter.

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“It’s good to see you again, Ozzi!” Melonie opened one of her arms to give Ozzi a hug. Ozzi promptly received Melonie’s hug. “Where’s Alastor?” Melonie asked.

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Ozzi slowly backed away from Melonie. “Oh. That’s right. Bria and him are on a mission in The Scar. Can’t say much else quite yet.”

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Melonie held her smile, but a feeling of disappointment washed over her. “When do you think he’ll be back?”

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Ozzi exhaled as he cracked his neck and stretched his shoulders. “Sheesh, there’s no telling. He bounces from place to place so often these days, I can’t keep track of him.”

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Melonie couldn’t pretend she was content any longer. “Oh. Okay.” Her smile faded.

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“Well, look on the bright side; you’re back with the team!” Ozzi placed his hand on Melonie’s shoulder. “C’mon, I’ll help you get adjusted to your new room. We’ve recently moved a few things around in The Bureau. Wait a minute; did you think I was serious about the interview?” Ozzi pointed to the portfolio Melonie was holding with a cheeky grin.

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Melonie blushed and awkwardly giggled, gripping the portfolio tighter. The two walked inside. Melonie’s heart was heavy. 

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**********

 

Ozzi and Melonie made it to Melonie’s new room. “Here it is.” Ozzi patted the door with his gloved hand. “Make yourself at home and let me know if you need anything.” Ozzi began to walk away.

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“Wait–” Melonie suddenly barked.

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Ozzi stopped dead in his tracks and turned back to Melonie. He raised his eyebrows.

“Can we talk?” Melonie twisted her lip. “It’ll be quick, I promise.”

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“Oh boy.” Ozzi walked back to Melonie. “I’m all ears.”

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“I have to be honest with you,” Melonie whispered. “I really need to see Alastor. When will he be back?”

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Ozzi rubbed his neck. “Yikes. He and Bria have been out of the city for the past two months.” He looked back at Melonie. Her soft, round eyes looked desperate. “I hate to break it to ya, but I wouldn’t hold my breath.”

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Melonie looked down in disappointment. She pouted to herself.

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“Hey, look.” Ozzi knelt down to meet Melonie’s eyes. “We’ll work together; I’ll keep you busy so you can keep your mind off of things.” Ozzi gave Melonie a well-meaning smile. “Before you know it, Alastor will be back in no time.”

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Melonie let a single tear fall from her left eye. She smiled, trying to humor Ozzi. But there was a well of tears ready to come gushing out at any second. “Thanks, Ozzi. I’m going to bring my stuff up out of the car. It’s only one suitcase.”

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“Awesome.” Ozzi stood up and walked away. “Holler if you need anything.”

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Melonie watched Ozzi leave her. She sighed to herself.

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**********

 

Melonie felt herself wake up, but she didn’t open her eyes. Did I get any sleep? She opened her eyes and looked at the alarm clock on her nightstand: 9:00 AM. She had gotten over eight hours of sleep yet she still felt so tired. She shifted under the sheets and plush comforter of the queen-sized bed as she groaned. I just want to lay here. I don’t want to move.

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Melonie sat up in the bed. The comforter and sheets fell off of her as she stretched. Her slim arms reached for the ceiling, cracking all of the bones in her arms. She let them lazily flop on the bed. She looked over to the mirror. 

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Melonie laid back down. She stared at the ceiling and sighed. 

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I’ve been like this for weeks…

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**********

 

Melonie walked into Ozzi’s Lab. She wore a yellow shirt, blue jeans, and black sneakers. She stood at the workbench and watched Ozzi work on a piece of blue armor. Small sparks flew from the armor plate. Melonie stared at the armor. That’s Alastor’s favorite color…  

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Ozzi noticed her and removed his goggles. “Well, good morning, sunshine.” He joked. “A few more minutes and we could have brunch.”

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Melonie giggled. She hid her concern for her own health very well.

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“And is that yellow? Never seen you wear yellow. Nice.” Ozzi complimented. “I’ve got a list of assignments that the Council needs to be done. Wanna dust off those Communication Officer skills for me?” He pointed to a folder on a nearby table with his welding torch. “Lord knows I suck at communicating…” He turned back to the armor he was working on and slapped his goggles onto his face. “Ouch…”

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Melonie walked over to the folder and immediately opened it. There were numerous incident and mission reports; all filed by either Bria or Alastor. Melonie leaned her back against the table, licked her thumb, and flipped through a few, they dated all the way back to June of 2016. She flipped back to the first report; it was dated for yesterday.

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Date: 11/15/2016

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Location: The Scar; Valhalla

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Operatives in Play:

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• Alastor Hacon

• Bria Midgette

• Fel (Killed in Action)

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Mission Report:

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“Per official Council communications, action was taken on a known Synthetic base in The Scar region of Midwest Valhalla. Intel stated that there was a key Legion asset in this base (from here on referred to as ‘The Nexus’). A blitz was conducted, staggering and disorienting Synthetic forces. Operatives entered the base to obtain The Nexus. Alastor Hacon confronted the high ranking Synthetic Legion Officer Fel. In an attempt to protect The Nexus, Fel fought Alastor Hacon and was killed. The Nexus was moved to an unknown location by Fel before her death. The mission has been deemed a failure. The Scar Base has been destroyed.”

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Submitted for approval by Blur Havok Commander-In-Chief Alastor Hacon

 

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Melonie’s heart stopped when she saw Alastor’s name at the end of the Report. “Commander-In-Chief”? When did that happen? Melonie took the folder out of the lab and down the hallway to the Communications Hub. She looked over the reports, trying to catch up with the events. Alastor and Bria had been all over the country; The Slums, Keine Ruckhher, Sinner’s Circle, Verfallen Coast. But New Valhalla City was never mentioned.

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Melonie felt a weight on her heart. Alastor could be gone forever. She didn’t know if she’d lose him in this war, either through death or through her being forgotten. She felt something odd. The sight of Alastor’s name gave her butterflies. Memories started filling her mind and a pained smile grew on her face. 

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The time Alastor and her snuck out on a school night to see the stars.

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The time Melonie went to Alastor’s house for dinner and to meet his mother.

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The time they spent a summer together at his aunt’s house.

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The time they went fishing and caught a huge catfish.

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The time they went to their first college football game together.

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One memory hit her hard, however. It was the last time she and Alastor spoke.

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“Alastor, can I tell you something?” Melonie asked, interlocking her fingers as she sat across from Alastor at a table in a common area of their university campus.

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“Yeah, what’s up?” Alastor remained in his nonchalant position in his seat, draping his left leg over the armrest.

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“I feel…” Melonie paused, trying to find the right words to describe how she felt. “I feel like we have this connection, you know?”

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“What kind of connection?” Alastor repositioned himself and sat in the chair properly.

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Melonie looked down and twiddled her thumbs. “Like…” Melonie looked Alastor in the eyes. “Like I could tell you anything.”

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“Why you bringin’ this up, Mel?” Alastor leaned forward slightly. “Something you wanna talk about?”

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Melonie looked away, then back at Alastor briefly. She continued to break eye contact. “Well, I just want to say…” 

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Alastor had a twinkle in his eye.

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“Thank you for being such a great friend.”

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The twinkle instantly disappeared.

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Melonie’s eyes filled with tears. Melonie, you idiot. You already had him. She thought. You had him and you completely shut him down! Melonie quietly wept at the realization. 

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Her heart hurt.

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She wanted it to stop.

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She wanted all of it to stop.

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Melonie wiped her face. She needed to get this work done for Ozzi. Her eyes were faintly red but dry. She pressed a few buttons on the console. A dial tone played for a few seconds as she typed on a keyboard.

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“Hello?” An older female voice responded.

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“Councilor Vasquez, it’s good to be working with you again,” Melonie said in a low-energy and formal voice.

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“Melonie Sanders?” Vasquez’s voice lit up. “The sole voice of sanity in Blur Havok is finally back!” she giggled. “It will be such a pleasure working with you again!”

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“I appreciate it, Councilor,” Melonie said with feigned happiness in her voice. Her face was without a hint of pride. “Anyways, I have these reports for you…”

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**********

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Weeks passed. Alastor hadn’t returned.

 

**********

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Melonie laid in bed. The crickets outside managed to be louder than the distant gunfire of warfare. She rolled her head over and looked at the alarm clock: 1:52 AM.

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Melonie’s sunken and lifeless eyes stared at the alarm clock. She hadn’t had an ounce of sleep since she laid down. Her heart ached in her chest. She felt a lump in her throat like she wanted to cry. It never seemed to fully come out.

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The pain.

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It didn’t stop.

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Why won’t it stop?

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How can I stop it?

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Melonie sat up. There’s only one way.

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Melonie slid out of the bed and slipped on her clothes that she had discarded in the middle of the floor. She grabbed her car keys and slunk out of the room. 

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Melonie tip-toed down the stairs and into The Bureau’s massive foyer. She noticed Ozzi was asleep on a nearby couch. Schematics, notes, and some kind of book about guns laid on top of him. He snored loudly.

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Melonie snuck past him and made her way down the hallway. She reached a large room at the end of the hallway. “Armory 01” was mounted on a metal sign at the top of the door. Melonie walked inside. There were rifles, shotguns, pistols, rocket launchers, and submachine guns, but none of those were of interest to her. She looked above the weapons lockers and froze. 

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Locked in a glass case was her purple UMP submachine gun. They kept it… 

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Melonie pushed her head down and found what she was looking for in a polymer crate; M67 grenades. She opened the crate, grabbed a grenade, and headed towards the exit. But not without looking back at her old gun and tearing up. She walked out of the Armory.

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When she returned to the foyer, she strode straight for the door.

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“Melonie?” Ozzi said in a deep voice. He was sitting upright.

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Melonie practically jumped out of her skin. She hid the grenade behind her back. “Hey, Ozzi.” She said as casually as she could with an explosive weapon hidden behind her back that could kill both of them.

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“What are you doing?” Ozzi asked in a groggy voice.

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Melonie began to edge towards the door. “I was just going to get some fresh air.”

Ozzi’s sleepy eyes narrowed. 

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“I’ve just been feeling… trapped.” Melonie said. The casual facade faded away. “I need to get away, y’know?”

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Ozzi scratched his hair. “No, I really don’t. Is there something you wanna talk about, Melonie?”

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“No,” Melonie said bluntly. “I’m already too much trouble.” 

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Ozzi’s eyebrows raised. “What?”

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Melonie stepped out of the door and shut it quickly behind her. She jogged to her compact sedan and jumped inside. She dropped the grenade in the cupholder and started the car. Melonie drove down the Hills and towards the Slums.

 

**********

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Melonie drove down the worn-out streets. The dim street lights in The Slums passed over her while she drove. She looked down at the grenade, then back at the road. She parked in a ruined cul-de-sac and turned off the car. Her headlights stayed on.

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Melonie slowly picked up the grenade and examined it. She rubbed the round, steel body of the grenade, taking the time to fully acknowledge the texture. She removed the safety clip from the grenade. Tears filled in her eyes. She thought about Alastor’s goofy antics. About Ozzi’s dry humor. About Bria’s vulgar, but endearing exclamations. 

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She thought about her friends.

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Melonie firmly held the grenade, pushing the safety lever down. She slipped her thumb into the pull ring. The tears fell from her eyes. 

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She pulled the ring and released the lever.

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The live grenade silently sat in her hand. 

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Strange. She always thought they ticked when they were live.

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In the distance, Melonie heard someone yelling. She didn’t acknowledge it.

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The headlights of her sedan turned off.

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Darkness.

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 **********

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The sound of Melonie’s own screaming faded in. She couldn’t see anything. It felt like her skin was ripped off and her bones were on fire. Hearing her own scream was surreal. Her voice twisting and screeching in agony. It was distorted, like a part of her mouth was missing.

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“Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.” she heard a male voice say. “Shit, shit, shit. Mel, what the hell were you thinking?!” His voice went softer and louder as if he was walking away and coming back. It was Ozzi. Everything went quiet after a few seconds.

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**********

 

The sound of a welding torch cracking woke Melonie up. Everything was still black. She had actually slept. The cracking stopped. She could hear a heart monitor nearby beeping at a calm, steady pace. “Hey,” Ozzi said. “Go ahead and tell him.” There were a few moments of silence. “Yeah, I’m certain. She needs to see him.”

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Melonie’s eyes shot open. A blinding light leered above her. She gasped.

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“Oh, shit. Bria, I gotta go.” Ozzi rushed to Melonie. “Melonie, wait.” Ozzi’s albino face watched over her. His eyes darted all over her body as if there was a lot of information to take in. “I need to warn you–”

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Melonie raised her hand to Ozzi. Five metal, mechanical fingers appeared before her. Ozzi stared at the fingers with Melonie, his mouth ajar.

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“Fuck.” Ozzi muttered.

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Melonie screamed in terror. She started bucking and thrashing in a flurry of limbs. The heart monitor gradually began beeping rapidly. “Melonie, wait!” Ozzi tried to hold Melonie down. “Computer! Voice control!” Ozzi yelled. “Sedate patient, stat!”

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Melonie felt her limbs grow numb and her body quickly shut down. She was asleep in seconds. The last thing she heard was Ozzi sighing out of relief. “I knew I should have gotten that layer of synthetic skin ready…”

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**********

 

Melonie felt herself wake up again. She jolted awake this time and sat straight up.

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“Ah. I was prepared this time.” Ozzi dryly joked. He walked over to Melonie and sighed. He had visible bags under his eyes. He sat at the foot of the operating table with a mirror in hand.”Um. Take a look.” Ozzi held up the mirror to Melonie’s face. Melonie saw…

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Her face. Her regular, same-as-always face.

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She touched her face. Her hands weren’t metal anymore. Her nails were actually better maintained than before. “Ozzi, what happened?”

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Ozzi lowered the mirror and frowned. “I don’t know. You tell me.”

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Melonie looked down in shame. “I’m sorry, Ozzi. I felt so alone.”

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“But you’re not, Mel.” Ozzi whimpered. 

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“I know, but it’s different. You…” Melonie paused. “You know how close Alastor and I were.”

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“You like him.” Ozzi smiled. “I gathered that.” Ozzi pointed at Melonie. “But you still scared the hell outta me, Mel. I’m always here for you, okay?”

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Melonie nodded. She looked at her hands. “But for real, what happened?”

​

Ozzi groaned. “Oh boy.” Ozzi picked up a nearby folder and opened it. “Well, because of… from here on out, let’s call this ‘the accident’, m’kay? Because of the accident, you now have twenty-nine registered synthetic implants.” Ozzi tossed the file exhaustedly onto a nearby table. “Through the power of science, you live.”

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“Why did you save me?” Melonie asked.

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“What the hell was I supposed to do,” Ozzi shot up and stalked away, clearly frustrated. “Let one of my closest friends die?”

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“But I made a choice.”

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“I don’t care,” Ozzi said coldly. “You made a choice that would have damned your closest friends. And you didn’t even talk to me about it.”

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Melonie realized how selfish her actions were. She lowered her head. “This is why I feel so worthless.” Melonie started crying. “I screwed over Alastor and I screwed you over. I decided to be the party girl a month before graduation and now I’m known as ‘Hoop Girl’. All because I wanted to fit in and do what I wanted.”

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Ozzi folded his arms and let Melonie talk.

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“I’m so stupid. Alastor wanted me and I pushed him away.” She looked up at Ozzi. “Now that I’m this half-robot freak, he’ll never want me. No one will.”

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Ozzi smirked and walked over to Melonie. He wrapped his arm around Melonie and comforted her. “Melonie, you haven’t a clue.” He rubbed Melonie’s black hair. “It’s gonna be alright.”

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 **********

​

The Vault Incident happened. The Synthetic Legion Supreme Leader Ryze was defeated and kept at bay. A month had passed.

 

 **********

​

Melonie stood in the lobby of The Bureau. She watched Alastor and Bria chatting from afar. The two had familial chemistry. It tickled Melonie. 

​

Alastor’s brown face smiled as he told his story. His brown dreadlocks swayed as he spoke in his animated demeanor. 

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“… So I told my friend ‘you better eat all that sushi, it’s a dollar a piece’. And this dude wraps the sushi in a napkin, stuffs it in his hoodie, and runs off to the bathroom.” Alastor spoke in his tenor voice.

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Bria giggled. Her almond skin radiated with energy. “You shittin’ me?”

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“Nope.” Alastor chuckled as he told his own story. “After like, fifteen seconds, we hear the toilet flush and he immediately comes back and sits down like he didn’t just flush ten dollars worth of sushi down the toilet.” 

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Bria and Alastor both burst out into laughter. Melonie couldn’t help but find Alastor’s laugh so warming.

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“Oh, I should tell you about the boat–” Alastor was about to start another story.

Melonie cleared her throat and raised an eyebrow to Alastor, giving him an all-knowing smirk.

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Alastor’s head whipped around. “I’ll catch you in a bit,” he told Bria. Alastor confidently strode to Melonie. His red eyes looked her up and down with a look of pride. “Hey, babe.” Alastor lifted Melonie’s chin and gave her a kiss. “Ready to head out?”

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She lovingly looked Alastor in the eyes. Melonie slowly nodded.

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**********

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You are not alone.

If you or someone you know is experiencing depression or thoughts of suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 (US) or 116 123 (UK) at any time.